...It's always me, isn't it? Don't you get tired...? You're always supporting me, Atem.
[Ryou closes his eyes, and he stays silent for a long moment after he says that. He has to think about what he's going to say. Atem is asking something of him that he can't give. He doesn't want the good and the bad to mix ever again, but if he closes Atem out, then...it's just as bad.
He hates this. He absolutely hates how something as stupid as an idiot shade's stomach growling could give this much away. Ryou really doesn't know how to take care of himself. He's leaned so hard on Atem that now they're back here, at the game metaphor he'd used months ago.
Ryou will never be better. He'll never be able to support Atem like he is himself being supported.
So...for Atem, he compromises. He owes him that much.]
You saw a great many things while we were children, didn't you. Terrible, awful things. About Marik, and about...me. Atem, I don't want to think about those things. They make me sad. I don't want to eat because I'm...sad about these things. My role in what has happened to me is upsetting, and I don't feel like indulging when I'm upset.
[It's a fair compromise. He's not telling a lie...but he's not telling the whole truth.]
I love you, and I don't want to put more on you. You're...already doing so much. When you come home, I want you to be able to come into my arms and feel secure in the fact that you can rest. So please, don't worry about me. I've already told you, all these things will pass.
Let me be of comfort. Don't let me be another puzzle you have to solve.
[He has no idea what Atem's thinking. He doesn't even know if saying this will help. It's couched in him trying to minimize how he feels...but also in trying to set Atem's mind at ease...]
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[Ryou closes his eyes, and he stays silent for a long moment after he says that. He has to think about what he's going to say. Atem is asking something of him that he can't give. He doesn't want the good and the bad to mix ever again, but if he closes Atem out, then...it's just as bad.
He hates this. He absolutely hates how something as stupid as an idiot shade's stomach growling could give this much away. Ryou really doesn't know how to take care of himself. He's leaned so hard on Atem that now they're back here, at the game metaphor he'd used months ago.
Ryou will never be better. He'll never be able to support Atem like he is himself being supported.
So...for Atem, he compromises. He owes him that much.]
You saw a great many things while we were children, didn't you. Terrible, awful things. About Marik, and about...me. Atem, I don't want to think about those things. They make me sad. I don't want to eat because I'm...sad about these things. My role in what has happened to me is upsetting, and I don't feel like indulging when I'm upset.
[It's a fair compromise. He's not telling a lie...but he's not telling the whole truth.]
I love you, and I don't want to put more on you. You're...already doing so much. When you come home, I want you to be able to come into my arms and feel secure in the fact that you can rest. So please, don't worry about me. I've already told you, all these things will pass.
Let me be of comfort. Don't let me be another puzzle you have to solve.
[He has no idea what Atem's thinking. He doesn't even know if saying this will help. It's couched in him trying to minimize how he feels...but also in trying to set Atem's mind at ease...]