Ryou Bakura (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
softspokenlandlord) wrote2020-11-18 01:10 am
softspokenlandlord) wrote2020-11-18 01:10 am
IC Inbox | ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
ryslig
WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, WhiteWizard. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 007.80.751.19 *** WhiteWizard has joined 007.80.751.19 <WhiteWizard> Hello, this is Ryou Bakura! <WhiteWizard> Feel free to reach out to me if you need anything. :) <WhiteWizard> I will get back to you as soon as possible. | ||||
...you are NOT kidding lmao
Ryou immediately bares his teeth, the shadows comprising his entire head shifting into something more menacing, teeth darkening and blending with the rest of the shadows and eyes widening into perfect circles as his hair seems to stand on end.]
I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF BEING CALLED STUPID, IF THAT'S ALL YOU'RE HERE TO DO, THEN YOU MAY AS WELL LEAVE ME ALONE!!
[Okay. Wow. So the answer is he's doing "terrible".]
no subject
Shit. You were "WhiteWizard", gods fucking damn it.
[ He hisses at himself, trying to think of something to... do with the info now that he has it... aaaand he's already out of ideas, great. "At least I know whether this is about Amane or about Javert" is less helpful than he'd expected. ]
...Not what I was here for, no. [ What does he do? Distract from or focus on?? The swan continues to watch Ryou carefully, shade-rage and all. ] Wasn't expecting to see you here at all.
no subject
He'd come out here to try and figure his thoughts out, maybe come to some sort of self-actualization about his life as a Shade and how he'd killed his sister and Javert wasn't right about him being deserving of this.
So having a swan swim up to him and then get catty with him had honestly just been too much.
Absolutely zero chill can be had here, though he doesn't scream so loudly this time.]
Yes, I'm WhiteWizard, and a whole lot of good it did for me to show my face on that network. I can never fight against my circumstances, as you see--I will always be wrong! As if I didn't already have enough to worry about, now I have some fucking religious zealot to worry about for all my continuing problems.
Because it's alright to be punished by someone wearing a fancy cape. He says the fog told him it's okay!
[Oof. Baggage much?
He takes a breath after that tirade...then pulls the shadows back a little. He's not a monster inside, just on the outside...don't be this way. Even if you're angry.]
Look...I came out here to relax. It clearly isn't working.
no subject
[ Damnit, what does he do with this?? ]
...He's not even being a zealot right, he's the wrong fucking alignment...
[ The Ring-Spirit sounds distracted even while he says it - because he really doubts "commiserate about the idiot priest" is going to help.
Hm. He peers at Ryou's face as he tries to feels his way through... what are they even doing and how does it work, someone get him a guidebook,,, ]
...Would "relaxing" help?
no subject
Ryou is...going to have to take this one step at a time, or else he's going to lose his mind.
As if he hadn't done that on the network already, but details.
He glares down at his journal, not really angry with it. Just angry in general. His eyes feel like there's a layer of heat forming along them--he's a shadow, surely he can't cry though. Regardless of if he could, he blinks it away and turns his head so he doesn't have to see the start of his letter to Amane.]
I don't even know how to relax, you know? How do you do that here? Every week or so I have to kill someone new. Every day that I'm here I have to worry about what's going to happen next. Am I going to transform into a giant shadow monster when it's foggy? Am I going to get into an argument with someone over taking away my agency?
[He actually does look at the Ring-Spirit this time, and there's a very not-normal smile on his face. It follows; this is probably the most he's opened up to the spirit at all.]
Am I going to have to eat my sister?
no subject
Ugh. The Ring-Spirit doesn't have much to work with in Ryslig. And if the Amane thing is still fucking Ryou up (and judging by that face Ryou's making it definitely is) then "hey lets play Monster World instead" isn't enough. And the whole "trying to handle the future before it's even started happening" angle is something the Ring-Spirit canNOT relate to. It's such a waste of time and energy and actually it's a thing he could advise against, right? That's. something. ]
So stop worrying. Shit will or won't happen. All worrying will do is wear you out before the shit's even started. It's true anywhere, but so much shit happens so often here, and - it's like DM'ing. No matter what you have planned, the players are going to find the one angle you never expected. Planning is just extra work that doesn't help, and worrying is just planning that's -[ er, "even more useless" might be bad phrasing?? what with the way Ryou exploded at the earlier thing, um, ]- ...less. helpful... to you...?
no subject
As far as he's concerned, this spirit never really cared very much for him at all, given the extremely cavalier treatment of Ryou's body. And uh...Ryou doesn't really believe too much of it has changed. He does still believe, however, that the Ring-Spirit has some level of interest in Ryou's welfare.
Care is perhaps...a strong word. Maybe a strong word he'd hate to hear said aloud and if Ryou was in any better a mood, he'd scoff. But he's not. And so after ruminating on those words a little, he just...responds as best he can.]
Worrying is tiring, but I can't just turn it off. As you so aptly put it, if I could stop worrying, then maybe I wouldn't have shattered my own soul to pieces. I would just accept the things I couldn't control.
[He seems to curl tighter into himself.]
But that's not how it works. And not planning for something doesn't make it any easier to swallow. This isn't a game I can just write off the parts of when I don't like them. DM-ing is about controlling the storyline and adapting to the players to continue a line of enrichment between both parties.
This...is not fun.
no subject
Ryou's unfortunately making very solid points. ]
Tch, "accept what you can't control" would never work, you're too much like me. If I'd been the one in those damned fucking dice -[ he's never getting over that little incident ]- I'd have done the same. damn. thing. Tch! Why'd you think I started handling you so fucking carefully after that?
[ Spoilers, Ryou: that treatment? Was the Ring-Spirit being (some degree of) careful. Him being cavalier would have been so, SO much worse. ]
...Ugh. [ What's left? He's half thinking aloud at this point. ] So you don't turn something off, you add something else, reroute your focus? ...Would Monster World help?
[ The swan turns his full attention back on Ryou. ]
I've got the rulebook, and I've got a laptop with the modifier calculations shit, character sheet recording, basically everything - except the table. I'm saving coins towards getting ours - or. yours, whatever - from Mana, but that'll take a while. Think we could build one from scratch?
no subject
He's not sure if he's ready to broach it yet though.]
I don't...
[Sigh.]
Monster World is something I miss, something I want. And of course I can build something, but it won't have the versatility--look. Just. Hold on a second.
[He shakes his head.]
I know this sounds ridiculous coming from me, the guy who kept playing games even when it meant it was enabling the darkness, but. Is...that really all you and Yugi can think about? I mean it, it's not an insult. I'm asking sincerely.
[The effort to redirect is appreciated, but probably isn't going in the direction that the Ring-Spirit wanted it to.]
1/? (RS can hide IC'ly behind a swan-face, but *I* have *icons*)
He's worked with nothing plenty of times before though. Gotta just keep going. He shakes his head to Ryou's question. ]
Can't speak for Yugi - he's your little friend, not mine - but I try not to think at all. Games are great as distractions, but anything will work if you pour enough effort into it.
2/?
Shit gets boring without games. ...It's. Everything sucks, why not turn what you can into a game? Tch.
3/?
Look, you said it yourself, life isn't fun. Games are. The entire concept of "roleplaying" is supposed to bridge that gap between simply ~being~ and playing a game. I don't - if you could be playing a game instead, why focus on the shit you hate? It won't get less shitty, and you won't start hating it any less either!
[ Just play Monster World instead, landlord!
The Ring-Spirit growls out of sheer frustration.
Why?! Why this?? Why not just IGNORE the problems? ]
I don't understand what you're trying to do here!
4/5
He doesn't want to understand, but he does.
And if he's like this, it's - ok lets be real here, he saw that shade-tantrum, Ryou's not doing good. Especially after that idiot priest got on his case.
The Ring-Spirit isn't sure how bad, exactly, things are, but. ...Ryou is more fragile than he is. Ryou hasn't dealt with the shit the Ring-Spirit has, Ryou isn't ancient, Ryou's not any measure of god, evil or otherwise - the Ring-Spirit can survive more damage than his landlord, it's just facts right. So... he should intervene somehow, redirect. Keep his fragile host (ex-host) in one piece for another day, at the cost of just a little more pain. Same principle as taking the dragon's attack, right?
How though. ]
What do I do, fuck.
[ He knows he doesn't need Ryou at this point. He's... just attached, he doesn't want to give up anything he sees as his. A while ago he would have needed to justify this way more to himself. He's the Darkness, after all - the Great Evil God... and the Thief-King was honestly more of a misanthrope - but after getting his village back (even if only "sorta"), and losing them again... He doesn't want to give up anything else.
That's all.
Getting his village back, and then the whispering. They whispered for days. Words. Sentences. Shit he didn't want to listen to. Shit he didn't need to think about. Anything and everything - whatever it'd take to MAKE him consume them.
And since he couldn't, he sat there and listened. And then lost them again anyway.
He doesn't know what to do, but he also doesn't want to lose anyone else. Not... right now.
...Not ever.
The fuck does he do. ]
5/5
This one freezes for a bit, staring and unresponsive. But he's done this before and (sorta) comes to again quickly enough, even if he's still a bit thousand-yard-stare-ish. ]
...I'm not helping here...
[ That determined, he turns to swim away, only to realize that there's no one else here, should he leave Ryou here alone or - he turns back again, swimming in a circle, before he decides that no really he isn't being helpful and turns to swim away again, only - you get the idea.
So now the Ring-Spirit is now uselessly circling and circling in the water, his breathing erratic, his thoughts are stuck in a loop.
It'll pass. Eventually, probably. ]
no subject
Yes, there were words in there, but Ryou has a feeling that in trying to be "helpful" the Ring-Spirit's just gotten himself bothered. And...Ryou hates that he actually feels some kind of bad for him.]
Look, listen. We process things differently. I like playing games to forget but I am...just not ready to let myself feel better. I know that it's terrible. It does suck. [Sigh. Ugh, he hates this, it's making him feel awkward.]
I don't know if you can relate to this, but it feels in poor taste to play games and think "yes this is so much better" after killing my sister. I can't just think about Monster World when that awful man admitted to helping push me down a path that I didn't want! Because I'm angry, and I'm sad. I need to feel that.
I guess I need to process it. But I can't.
[Aaaand now he's awkward again. You know, he doesn't mind the Ring-Spirit leaving right at that moment after all. This is stupid. He is wasting the spirit's time with this.]
no subject
It's never going to stop.
[ His confused paddling ceases. He continues to turn a bit as the momentum slowly dissipates into the rest of the pond, but he has a long twisty neck and easily cranes it around to stare back at Ryou.
The Ring-Spirit may be in swan-form to avoid giving away his facial expressions, but the manic grin is audible. His voice is taking on an inhuman rasping quality. ]
You'll feel better while you play, and the instant you stop it'll all come right back~!
"Processing" won't change anything - you're angry and sad, and you'll stay angry and sad, and it'll get worse~! H-haha-ha-hahah-ha-! [ Abruptly, the swan takes wing. The laughter's just getting more unhinged.
It's clear he means to fly off, but he hasn't gotten far yet, if Ryou still wants to engage with uh.
This. ]